Perfection and the Death of Creativity

In the many years that I've been writing, I've made a discovery. The more I try to perfect something, the 

less creative I am. The more I am reaching for a goal, the less joy there is in the journey.

Could it be that writing is best when sparked by a childlike zest and enthusiasm.....an enthusiasm that comes not so much from wondering what the end result will be, but rather an enthusiasm just from the joy that comes with the expression?

We all want to be the best at what we do. We all want to write to the best of our ability. But isn't there a fine line somewhere in which those wants for perfection drive the perfection right out of us? Can a bird soar locked in a cage? Can a horse run free tied to a post? Aren't they most beautiful when they are totally free to soar and to run with the wind?

Sometimes I feel the urge to write something just well up inside of me and I feel like I will burst if I don't get it out of my system. So I sit and I write and it flows out of me like water in a stream. The flow doesn't stop. There are no barriers to my creativity. But if I take that urge and analyze it and organize it and pick it to pieces, my urge leaves. And what is left is only a shell of what I truly felt like writing. My rainforest suddenly becomes a barren desert.

I've always envied writers who are so organized in their thoughts...the ones who make a living from writing and doing nothing else. In my mind, that has always seemed so perfect ....to make a living at doing what you most love to do. But I'm not sure I could do it. How many edits of my work would eventually edit the heart and soul right out of it?

And deadlines. Nothing kills my passion more than a deadline. Some people thrive on deadlines, but not me. When I have a deadline, I feel like I am being forced to create. And when I'm placed in a box like that, my creativity decides to take a nice long nap.

I create best in the least expected moments. So I carry pen and paper with me always. Sometimes I find myself breaking out in laughter at the odd places and times I have to stop what I'm doing to write. It may be in a restaurant. Or at work. Or in the middle of a conversation with a friend. Very often music sparks my creativity.

I recently sold an article I wrote about a man I pass by every day. Every day at rush hour he stands on the street corner and waves at the passing traffic. And it is quite obvious that he is mentally challenged in some way. After passing him every day for a couple of weeks, I found that one day he wasn't there. I actually felt sad and realized that I had gotten used to his smile and waves. This sparked a little article. And I was so surprised when it sold because I wrote it from my heart and it took all of 5 minutes to write. But if someone had told me to write such an article, and given me a list of guidelines...along with a deadline.....I couldn't have done it. My heart would not have had that creative joy in the process of writing it.

We were born to create. And some of the most beautiful things we create are done out of our lust for life and the inner passion to express it. We should all tap into that source from time to time. Even writers who are able to make a living with their craft, facing deadlines and constant guidelines need to take time to tap into their inner childlike passion. We need to learn how to focus more on the process of becoming rather than the end result.