A Personal Message to Anyone Who Struggles with Being Different

My heart goes out to anyone out there who is "different".  Different comes in a variety of shapes, sizes, and ways of thinking.  I have always been different in that I have struggled with my weight all of my life.  I was a chubby child, a chubby teenager, and an overweight adult.  I have never felt like I fit in anywhere, and this destroyed my self-esteem.

As a child, I felt the stigma of my weight follow me everywhere from shopping trips with my mom to school where I was always chosen last to play games at recess.  As a teenager, I felt the stigma at not being able to wear the cool clothes that other people wore.  As an adult, I have felt the stigma follow me in job searches, in not being able to participate in many activities with my children (such as riding roller coasters).  I have had other parents say rude and hateful things to me or my children.  I remember one particularly painful episode when my daughter was around four years old.  I had taken her to a birthday party.  At one table a lady was serving birthday cake.  When I took my daughter over to the table, she asked if she could please have a slice of cake.  The woman looked at her and said, "Oh honey...are you sure you want cake?  You don't want to end up looking like your mom, do you?"  At the time, I wanted to crawl under the table and hide.  I was more than humiliated.  All I could do was walk away and go home and cry.  If this happened to me today, my reaction would be much different.

I am a child of God.  I am special and loved by Him just as I am.  He knows my struggles at losing weight. God knows I have lost and gained it back, and He knows the deep inner pain that has led to that revolving cycle.  God knows that I am not lazy.  God knows that I care deeply about my health.  God knows that I am a kind and loving person behind any excess weight that is on my body.  Coming to this realization has opened the door for a tremendous amount of healing in my life.  It has opened the door for me to finally lose some of the weight that I have carried for years.  Do I still have more to lose?  Yes.  It is a process, and one that God is helping me with each and every day.

If you struggle with being different in any way, take heart.  You ARE special.  You ARE loved.  God made you, and He thinks you are beautiful just as you are.  He knows your pain, your heartache.  He is with You though it all, and when you are feeling at your lowest that is when God can show you his incredible strength and power.  He can lift you up into places you never dreamed of.  Never give up on yourself.  You are a work in progress at the hands of the Master Creator.

                                                               Photo by Cheryl Williams